Friday, November 7, 2008

No Decaf for My Cellulite - Top 10 Uses for Coffee Grounds

Praise God there is a monumental discovery afoot! Coffee can cure your unsightly hail damage. You know, the lovely black diamond mogul covered ski slope on the back of your legs, bum...well, everywhere?

So, from the research I found, about 80% of women have cellulite. GASP! HORROR! 80% would include a lot more ladies than just those of us who are a bit more squishy. Anyway, so I LOVE ME SOME COFFEE! What I also love is being able to use and reuse things for several purposes. And to my sheer delight, coffee grounds is a natural remedy for curing cellulite. Note: I'm not a doctor, I just read the article.

Apparently supermodels use this as well as high end spas. An article from iVillage, stated the way to do it is to spread newspaper on your bathroom floor, and take warm coffee grounds and massage them into your cellulite. Most of the coffee grounds will fall to the ground, but there is something in the "high octane" residue that wakes up your fat cells. CRAZY! I don't know if this actually works or not, but it makes for an interesting thought. Can you just imagine if someone walked in on me rubbing coffee grounds on my legs and my response was, "Hey. I'll be right out, I'm just caffeinating my fat." Too funny! I'm not knocking it though. If it works, then we're in for one heck of an affordable fat treatment.

I'm thinking though that I might want to up the ante on my coffee and go from decaf. to regular. No unleaded for my fat. I go first class all the way. I wonder if the cellulite goes away faster depending on how expensive the coffee is. Like, Starbucks for example, their coffee grounds are strong enough to eliminate my cellulite and make me ready for the prom. Tee, hee! I am getting such a kick out of this.

Hey, it puts a whole new meaning to "the best part of waking up, is Folgers on your trunk."


1. Flea Dip Alternative - after bathing your lovable pooch, massage used coffee grounds into his/her coat. This is said to keep those pesky little fleas away. "I ain't got no bugs on me, I ain't got no bugs on me. There may be bugs on some of you mugs, but there ain't no bugs on me"...just coffee.

2. Kitty Begone - tired of the neighborhood cats or even your adorable feline using your garden as a litter box? Put used coffee grounds and orange peels in garden soil and supposedly, you'll no longer have a kitty problem.

3. Gardening Goddess - aside from repelling snails and slugs, adding coffee grounds to your garden soil and even the soil of indoor plants, will boost nutrients. Coffee grounds serve as a great fertilizer as it give nutrients, namely a nitrogen supplement, for plants that live in acidic soil.

4. Crafty Coffee - use coffee grounds in a great craft with the special kiddos in your life. You can make your own fossils. Here's a link all about it:

5. Dust Away - toss wet grounds on fireplace ash to keep from dust getting out of control when you're cleaning.

6. Smell No More - rub coffee grounds into hands to take away strong food odors like onions.

7. Shine On - add shine and soften hair. When washing, rub used grounds through wet hair and then rinse.

8. Dye It - use to dye fabrics, paper and Easter Eggs.

9. Who Needs Arm & Hammer - place dried coffee grounds in a bowl, add a few drops of vanilla and place in the freezer to remove unwanted odors.

10. Skin Treatment - and the topic of this post, skin treatment. Use coffee grounds to remove cellulite and to exfoliate skin.

** I haven't tried any of these, so if you have, let me know if any of them work.

Here's a link to the iVilliage article, but do a Google search for coffee grounds and cellulite and enjoy the reading material.


Francois said...

"I'm thinking though that I might want to up the ante on my coffee and go from decaf. to regular. No unleaded for my fat. I go first class all the way."

I nearly fell off my chair laughing.... :)

Woman on a Mission said...

I had a ball writing this. I got such a kick out of it this morning especially where I was drinking my coffee at the same time. Hilarious. Thanks for the props!

tanya said...

i heard about coffee grounds and plants..and it worls!!!! but not cellulite!! lol!! thats too funny!!

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