Sunday, January 4, 2009
For Christmas, I got hubs Guitar Hero. He works hard so I figured he should be able to play hard too and this is a game I can play unlike all those sports games. I love sports, but I do NOT understand all the controls to the XBOX games. I mean...wow.
Anyway, so we have been putting Hambone to bed and spending some fun couple time jamming to some great rock hits. Is it fair then, where this was a gift for my husband, that I totally smoke him? I love healthy competition but he gets a little fed up with my ability to totally out axe him. So, we've now moved to Co-Op play, meaning we play the song together, one as bass the other as lead guitar.
I know that this is completely nontraditional, but it got me thinking. When we are working on our marriages, we often need to shake things up a bit and be nontraditional. We think about improving our marriages and we think of expensive dinners out, babysitters which also cost money, movies which cost too much money plus don't allow for bonding/communication or we think of reading self/couple help books. I'm not saying that any of these are bad, in fact, I enjoy a peaceful dinner out with candlelight in a restaurant without crayons. I enjoy being able to watch a movie without multiple distractions. However, that can't be the only thing we have to do, right?
Who ever made the decision that when you reach a certain age, you have to stop having fun? Or that I DO really means, I DON'T have anymore fun. When was the last time you and your spouse took off just the two of you, grabbed a quick bite to eat and hit the bowling alley? Putt-Putt? Or what about staying home and playing a board game together or maybe even a little Guitar Hero?
Hubs and I have had so much fun playing this game TOGETHER. One isn't in one room and the other in another. We're playing together. Laughing, joking around and having simple youthful fun. We've been having so much fun, that we look forward to it at the end of the day. So we release the day's stress and spend fun time together.
This whole notion got us thinking. What are things we do together that are not so much fun? Hmmm...any guesses what those can be? Yup...fiances, bills, taxes, some yard work (other stuff is fun), disciplining children, cleaning the house, organizing the garage...etc. Have you also happened to notice that the spare time you do happen to find for time with each other, most often is filled by one of the activities above? I have. So, what if we made a pact that after every 'not so fun' activity, we follow it up with a fun activity. It doesn't have to involve us going some where, or if we do, it doesn't have to involve us spending a lot of money or going out of state. We could go for a walk in the park and hold hands and talk about other things after an intense afternoon with the taxes. We could wrap up a trying week with a game or cooking together, or, if we so choose, reading together. There are so many things that we can do as couples to enjoy each other.
Maybe that is why so many people are unhappy in their marriages. The only time they ever get with each other is time spent on unpleasant things. Then we go seeking the pleasant things in sinful places. It makes a huge difference to your personal emotional health as well as the emotional well being of your marriage to be intentional about taking time for it. Go get that ice cream together. Have a tickle war. Have a food fight. Do what you really want to do and do it together. Start dating your spouse again. It's a lot of fun and you'll wonder why you ever stopped. Plus...it's really great for your kids, if you are parents, to see you having fun. Giddy, side-splitting, memorable and healthy fun.
As a final note, I also think its fun to take the time to become active in your church as a couple. Whether that's through small groups, couples groups or Sunday schools. You can't just feed your relationship once and then expect it to flourish and live forever on nothing more. Give it water, care and the SON. You'll be amazed at how your marriage will grow.
Posted by Freddae' at 6:25 PM