Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Love Dare

This past Friday was a great evening for me. Hubs came back from Houston on Wednesday evening and for the first time in well over a year, we were able to go out on a 'date night'. Hubs took me to my favorite German restaurant and then we went out for a movie; we went to see Fireproof.

Let me preface this by telling you about Tuesday. On Tuesday, I went to a local Christian book store to pick up a Bible Commentary and a book on writing tools of Exegesis. Yeah, crazy weird word that no one has ever heard of unless you pursue a degree of some sort in religious or theological studies. Anyway, I'm a window shopper. This store is one of my favorites as it has some of the most beautiful Christian decorations in it and my heart always feels warm when I leave. Well, as I was walk back towards the books I made sure I swung past the decorations and gifts. On my way, I stopped suddenly at a display for the movie Fireproof - the new Christian movie in theatres. There were several things at the display: trinkets, jewelry, the book for the movie and then there was this plain and mysterious brown book. I picked it up, looked at it briefly, put it back and walked away. Strangely, I was pulled back to the display and back to that book. I picked it up again and opened it reading a bit on the inside. It was called The Love Dare and was about marriage, strengthening your love relationship with your partner and doing it in a Christ centered way. Interesting. But, I put it back. As I started to walk away again, it was as if I hit this solid pane of glass and couldn't move any further. I stopped, left my cart, went back, grabbed the book and threw it in my cart.

When I got home, I looked at it a little further and as God always does, it was a message I needed to hear and God was getting through to me. The Love Dare is a 40 day challenge to improve your marriage, even if it is going strong. It focus's on love, patience, kindness, selflessness...and much more. The book was a main focus of the movie Fireproof, and having not seen the movie, I was without that extra content, but just the same, I knew I needed this book. You see, the further I grow in faith, the more I'm challenged, the hotter the fire gets and the more resistance the world gives me. Many of the people who I consider my spiritual advisers or sounding boards have told me this would happen and to keep going. I never knew it would attack my marriage...but it has. I love my hubs dearly, but we're human, we're flawed, and things haven't been easy lately for many reasons. It's just been hard; brutally hard and we've been failing each other. It's of course, in these times that the horrid "D" word gets tossed around and your marriage, not to mention your heart is nothing less then broken.

On Thursday night, I sat down with hubs and showed him the book and we talked about it and decided we would do it together. Though we read at night, we read for the next day, so we started day 1 of 40 on Friday. Friday night, we went to see Fireproof and it all came alive to both of us. Couples of all ages and stages packed the tiny theatre until there were no seats left and by the end of the film, everyone, and I do mean EVERYONE was in tears. This movie is the real deal. All pastors should sponsor a night out to this movie or once released, sponsor a night in at the church to show this movie to couples. The main character is a fire chief and he talks about how in a fire, you are to never leave your partner. The rest of movie goes on to show that is true in your marriage also. That when the heat is on and the fire is raging, you NEVER leave your partner. That's when it gets dangerous. I'm not sure what the future will bring. What I am sure is that we have nothing to loose by give not just love but God a chance in our marriage. I have prayed for months that God would come into my marriage and move mountains. I now know God has heard my cries. We are on day 3 and so far, so good.

If there is anything I can ask today, it is that you find your way to this book The Love Dare and you find your way to this movie, Fireproof. Even if your marriage is on the last thread and divorce seems imminent, please try one last thing. If hubs and I have nothing to loose, then neither do you. And if your marriage is going strong and good times are here for you, don't think you can't benefit from this too...because challenges are just around the corner. Fireproof yourselves now, before it gets too hot.

God bless all of you and your marriages. If your heart is breaking, know that God is always with you and you are never alone. And divorce doesn't mean God stops loving you. It doesn't mean you're loved any less or that you're lesser of a person. You are just as important as the person next to you. We are to love God first and then our neighbor as ourselves. But remember, in order to love our neighbors as ourselves, we must first know what it means to love ourselves and we learn that from truly, deeply, unequivocally loving God.

If you've seen the movie, read the book, are doing the Love Dare, or have any other insight, please share them with me and the readers who follow. We would be blessed by your thoughts.


David Richardson said...

I too saw this movie. It's pretty moving! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

Francois said...

Tiffany, once again you have blown me away with your words. You have a very real gift of getting to the heart of the matter.

Hayley and I also went through a very tough time 2 years ago (in fact it`ll be 2 years on Friday, to be specific). We came through that by the grace of God and have grown stronger and stronger. When I look back I see God`s Hands in so many things that happened during that time. He truly is amazing.

We have had a tough year, with my company going under and all the stresses that accompany something like that. What has become clear, is that what we went through 2 years ago, actually made it possible to handle this year much better. God used that difficult time to equip us to handle other things on our path better.

Being in South Africa, Fireproof hasn`t been released yet but I`m sure it will be in a week or two. I`ll keep an eye out for the book too, like you say we have nothing to lose.

Once again thank you for your incredible words and you and hubby will be in my prayers tonight.

God bless

Woman on a Mission said...

Thanks Guys!

Francois - your words are too kind. Thank you for you compliment and for sharing your personal story with me. I do hope you are able to see this soon as it will come to life for you then. God bless you and your marriage my friend.

Francois said...

Hayley and I went looking for the book last night but it`s not available yet. I`ll let you know as soon as we have found it.

Hayley, just like me, adores your blog!

Woman on a Mission said...

They also sell it online at It's around $8 dollars there opposed to the $11 I paid in the store. I'm not sure if they ship to your location, but I think they do. Let me know how else I can help. God bless you and your awesome wifey...she has to be awesome if she digs this blog. ;-)

tanya said...

is the movie able to rent now?? i want to watch it with my husband!!it will be easier to watch the movie than to read the know how men are!! thanks

Woman on a Mission said...

Tanya -
It hasn't been released on DVD yet but it is in the theaters although I've noticed it being fazed out. Check your local dollar theater, otherwise, it should be out right before Christmas or shortly after the first of the year. I haven't read the book, but if I see the movie first it usually ruins the book for me. Plus, like you, my hubs would have never gotten into the book.

The Running Golfer said...

Hello again! Well, I can finally say we got to see Fireproof over the weekend. It never made it to cinematic release and went straight to dvd.
We absolutely loved it! What a great story! The Love Dare is also out in the Christian book stores, so we`ll get a copy very soon.

Thanks for telling me about this awesome book / movie!

Ps. Did you guys do the 40 days? Maybe you can do a post?

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